Grieving out-loud
The book of Psalms in the Hebrew Scriptures is full of upbeat, heartwarming songs that people of faith have been drawn to for centuries. These songs remind us that the LORD is our shepherd, encourage us to make a joyful noise unto the LORD, and reassure us that the LORD is our refuge and strength in times of trouble. Many of the psalms also describe the awesome beauty of God’s Creation.
Not so popular are those Psalms that are full of pain and anger — laments that include descriptions of tragedy, destruction and humanity at its worst. We tend to skip over these Psalms, and yet there is so much to be learned from them. One such Psalm is Psalm 137. Identified as a “lament over the destruction of Jerusalem,” the psalmist’s words are full of both anger and anguish as he describes the pain of being held captive in Babylon, knowing that his homeland of Jerusalem has been razed to its foundation by the enemy and life will never be the same again, even if he and his people are able to one day return to the land they love.
Singing his grief and the grief of the Hebrew people, the psalmist expresses his unapologetic desire for revenge and retribution. “O daughter Babylon, you devastator! Happy shall they be who pay you back what you have done to us! Happy shall they be who take your little ones and dash them against the rock!” Did the writer of Psalm 137 really say that out-loud? While we may be inclined to come down hard on this writer for vocalizing such despicable things, we are reminded that we have a God who can deal with our outbursts, no matter how harsh or cruel they may be. We are also reminded that grief has a way of bringing down barriers, often causing those who grieve to abandon the filters that usually keep emotions in check and prevent them from saying things that are just plain awful.
The good news is that we have a God who can handle our worst thoughts and our cruelest words.
It is far better to verbalize these feelings to God then to keep them bottled up inside, because when such feelings are bottled up inside, they eventually come spewing out in ways that are unhealthy and destructive. Once we have let it all out, the challenge is to trust God to help us move beyond the dark place in which we find ourselves, and that requires faith.
Faith, which is more a “heart” thing than a “head” thing, calls us to remember that, in the past, God never abandoned those he loved, and God is not about to abandon us either. Faith is not primarily about possessing a particular set of beliefs or doctrines, but about daring to trust the One whose mercy, grace and compassion are beyond our fathoming. Author Madeleine L’Engle wrote: “Faith is what makes life bearable, with all its tragedies and ambiguities and sudden, startling joys.” Faith does not magically make everything better, nor does it fix all that is broken.
What faith does is remind us that we are not alone in our pain. We have a God who understands our grief, longs to dry our tears, and promises to hold us close on life’s most challenging and heartwrenching journeys. May that be enough to sustain us and give us strength for today, as well as bright hope for tomorrow.