Paradise & perdition
I had heard heavenly things about Grand Cayman, so it came as a surprise that one of the most visited places on the island is Hell. Choosing whether to see heaven or hell first to me was like deciding whether to hear good or bad news first. I opted to start with Hell.
My fellow travelers and I hailed a taxi to take us to the West Bay district from George Town, the capital of the Cayman Islands and where I mostly went window shopping because there were more high- end retailers like Rolex than kitschy souvenir stores. We passed block after block of neatly kept houses with large yards, so when we arrived at a fire- engine-red building in Hell, it stood out like a sore thumb.
Hell was not soft-spoken. “Jesus died for all of us so give him your heart and go to heaven …” was painted in large letters across the bright exterior of the modest-size structure.
Behind it was a deck overlooking a cluster of short, black limestone formations stretching about half a football field. A ministration apparently exclaimed that it must be what hell looks like, and the name stuck. Landing on the jagged rocks had to be painful. And it was forbidden.
“Removal of Hell rock is prohibited by the law of the Cayman Islands. Thank you,” was written on a wooden plank and signed, “The Devil.” A demon-like figure stood beside another sign that read, “Do not climb or sit on the railing. Thank you.”
I then ventured into the red building, which was the Devil’s Hangout Gift Shop. Many visitors wrote postcards from Hell and dropped them in an old-fashioned mailbox, placed conveniently outside the gift shop. Before leaving, I made sure to get my passport stamped.
We realized we had fallen into the ultimate tourist trap when we spotted an adjacent white, normal-looking Hell Post Office. But we didn’t mind the burn.
Within walking distance of Hell was another, more pleasant-sounding attraction, the Cayman Turtle Centre. Legend has it that Christopher Columbus originally named the islands Las Tortugas because of the many sea turtles he saw in the shallow waters. A massive pond in the middle of the conservation facility was filled with the serene creatures, which would swim up within arm’s reach of visitors.
Touching the big sea turtles was not allowed, but another pool section had smaller ones that guests could catch with their hands and hold. One that I picked up seemed gentle but flapped its fins like wings in the air.
Not far from the turtle center was the Tortuga Liquor and Rum Cake Factory, which I had heard was a must-taste. A worker at the factory handed out samples of the original rum cake and with one bite, I understood why the moist, spirits-infused dessert became world famous. I also indulged in the decadent chocolate rum flavor.
I knew I would be missing a slice of heaven in Grand Cayman if I did not visit Seven Mile Beach. It was on the way back to George Town, so we took a bus that operated more like a shuttle service that let us off at an area called Public Beach, though the entire waterfront is open to the public.
The beach is really less than 7 miles long, making it the perfect length walk back to town. We passed water activities such as jet skiing and paddle boarding, as well as honeymooners, families, sand castles and five-star resorts.
Seven kilometers away, earlier in the day, staring at the rocks of Hell, I had found it hard to imagine Seven Mile Beach was named among the top four beaches in the Caribbean and among the top 12 in the world. But walking barefoot on the soft coral sand and gazing out at the crystal clear aqua water, I learned not to bet against it.
Grand Cayman shaped up to be pure good news.