The Day

Crush on married boss causes heartache every day for worker

- By Abigail Van Buren

DEAR ABBY: I'm 20 years old and have a job in retail. I have been working here for a few years and am in a higher position than most associates.

I'm in a relationsh­ip with my high school sweetheart, whom I truly love, but I am also crazy about my boss. She's beautiful, funny, and to be honest, I jumped at my promotion so I could get closer to her.

I feel terrible because, while I love my girlfriend (she's amazing), if I were given the chance to be with my boss, I'd have a hard time saying no. Thankfully, my boss is in a long-term marriage, so I know in my head I have no chance, but it hurts to go on every day thinking about her. I'd hate myself if I never told her how I feel about her. What should I do?

— REALLY CONFUSED IN RETAIL

DEAR REALLY CONFUSED: Because you are excelling in this retail job, consider asking your beautiful, funny, married boss to write a positive letter of recommenda­tion for you so you can find another job in retail — one that won't make you ache every time you clock in.

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have been asked to be in his sister's wedding. We said yes, mostly out of obligation.

There will be three married couples in the procession. I recently learned that my sister-in-law plans to have the couples split up and walk with others. I think it's extremely weird and rude, so much so that we want to back out. Neither of us cares to be in a memory book with us posing with other people. It's not that either of us is jealous; we have been married for 24 years. What do you think?

— FEELING OBLIGATED IN THE EAST

DEAR FEELING OBLIGATED: I think that before you take offense and back out, you should ask your sisterin-law why she wants to do this. It could be something as simple as variations in the height of the participan­ts and not weird or rude. Between you and me, unless you and your husband feel so strongly about this that you are willing to create a rift in the family, you should go along with his sister's fantasy of her perfect day.

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