Cranky work friend could impact career

DEAR ABBY: I moved to town not long before the pandemic and don’t have many close friends here.

One of my best friends is a co-worker, “Ronna,” whom I love dearly.

Ronna has had an extremely rough past, including an extensive history of parental abuse that has left her thin-skinned and suspicious of authority figures. Because of this, she’s constantly butting heads with our management team and confronting them about perceived slights.

I’m torn between loyalty to my friend and the need to remain on good terms with our higher-ups. I’m also worried that my friendliness with management will lead to Ronna distrusting me. How can I navigate? — In the Middle in Colorado

DEAR IN THE MIDDLE: Do not involve yourself in Ronna’s problems on the job. If you do, they will spill over onto you. Maintain your personal relationship with her away from the office, while networking and trying to widen your circle of friends.

From what you have written, I doubt that Ronna will be working for your employer much longer.

DEAR ABBY: I am having problems with my baby dad helping me with our 2-yearold daughter. I don’t like the idea of putting him on child support. I have tried counseling with him. In addition to asking him to step up, I have tried giving him lists of what our daughter needs, and he still isn’t helping. Instead he’s asking me to help with his bills.

I really don’t want to go after child support since he now has two jobs. I need his help, but I don’t know how to get him to contribute. Any ideas? — Struggling Mom in Ohio

DEAR MOM: You have tried asking, you have tried counseling. The only option left to convince him to step up to the plate and fulfill his obligations as a father is to contact Child Support Services and ask for help.

P.S. You absolutely should NOT pay his bills!

DEAR ABBY: I have been asked by a close friend to officiate at his wedding. I’m honored to have been asked, and it would be easy for me to get the credentials, but I am not comfortable doing it for personal reasons. How can I politely decline without hurting our friendship? — Not for Me

DEAR NOT: Be honest to the degree that you can be without causing hurt feelings. Explain that you are honored to have been asked to officiate (which is true), but would not be comfortable in that role (also true). Then deflect by offering to support your friend in some other way on his special day.