Woman filters out bad news
DEAR ABBY: Clearly, America is in a state of turmoil. I am horrified and ashamed of the senseless death occurring daily.
I deal with anxiety, particularly regarding fear of death. As a result, the only thing I’ve found that I can do to cope with current events is to scan headlines, and ask my understanding husband for a synopsis of events that doesn’t include major triggers.
However, I feel serious guilt that I may not be fully educating myself on recent events. Am I wrong to prioritize my mental well-being over the gravity of our country’s current situation? — SERIOUS GUILT
DEAR SERIOUS GUILT: Wrong? Absolutely not! According to The Journal of the American Medical Association, 13 percent of Americans now use antidepressants to combat depression and anxiety. Our news media feed so many salacious details into our homes in the interest of high ratings that it’s a miracle the majority of Americans aren’t in need of them.
If you are getting the news you need to know, do not feel guilty for using your husband as a filter. You are only protecting yourself, and that’s not wrong. It’s HEALTHY.
DEAR ABBY: I need advice. I’m 23 and have been living with my boyfriend of almost two years. I have never been in a relationship before this one, so I have little experience. I love him dearly, but every time there’s an issue between us, it always becomes my fault and I’m always the one to apologize. What should I do? — INEXPERIENCED IN TAMPA
DEAR INEXPERIENCED: Even a stopped clock is right twice a day. You should not be forced into the role of perpetual peacekeeper by accepting the blame for everything, and it won’t improve your relationship.
Because your boyfriend’s preferred method of solving disagreements is laying the blame on you, suggest the two of you get couples counseling. However, if he refuses — and he may — you will then have to decide whether this is the way you want to spend the foreseeable future because things aren’t likely to change.