I planned to take a year out but this job just felt right
AFTER leaving Aberdeen last March, I made a pact with my wife Nicola to take a year out. I was eight years at Pittodrie and that involved a lot of driving up and down the road. The plan was to enjoy the break and, unless something was really going to grab me, wait for the right opportunity.
I’ve felt the benefit of being around my family, my kids, of being spontaneous in terms of holidays and making plans.
Yet on Friday morning I found myself not walking the dog, but back in the car and driving through the snow to get to Rugby Park for a 7am start.
Kilmarnock have taken a leap of faith with me — and vice versa.
Neither of us wants to be in the Championship. They have been a proud top-tier club for 28 years and I feel privileged they have asked me to be the one to try to get them back where they should be.
I hadn’t put myself forward but once the club indicated they wanted to speak to me I became curious.
I really liked the people and how I felt I was going to be able to manage.
Right away, I picked up on the similarities between Billy Bowie and guys like Geoff Brown at St Johnstone and Stewart Milne at Aberdeen, chairmen who really let me get on with it. If we do things right here, we can go and make quick gains. If we can get the team promoted, the potential is there.
And location is a factor. I’ve worked
away from home for nearly ten years and the travelling back and forth can be a strain.
Here, I’m only half an hour along the back road.
Over these past months, I’ve got used to being at home — I must stress I have really enjoyed the break and feel I have maximised my time out.
Yet as much as we tried to stick to that year out, there have been opportunities to consider.
The West Brom job came up in the summer and there was a natural attraction to that. I had played there and captained the club but I never got an interview.
Later I did have an interview further south and felt I was close. There were another couple of offers in England, one from the States and something totally different that emerged recently. You’re always looking for a connection, that intuition which you only get by being in the room with people.
First impressions have mirrored what I had thought about the club, that it is full of people we can work with.
I’ve always been an early riser and like an hour to myself before the staff arrive but I’ve noticed Kev the Kilmarnock kitman has been in before me each day!
Friday’s weather was challenging — the ground staff worked like Trojans to get snow off the pitch so we were able to train.
Billy came in on Thursday for a chat and was very encouraging. The players have been receptive to the message from myself, Tony Docherty and Paul Sheerin as we try to get our thoughts across.
It’s not ideal to change manager mid-season but we’ll try to win games as we assess the squad and try to take advantage of the January transfer window. Already I’ve been bombarded by agents suggesting players.
I have only been able to get back to a fraction of the well-wishers who have sent me messages because I’ve been on the phone to so many agents.
It’s important to take a breath and look at the squad. I have an idea of what we may well need but some of the answers may well lie within the building.
James Fowler is our director of football and, although he has a role that stretches beyond recruitment, he will be working closely with me through the window. At any point in my career, my motivation is always to prove people right. I want to prove that the Kilmarnock board were right to appoint me.
I’m proud of what we achieved at Aberdeen. If someone had told me on day one we’d achieve what we did, I would have been satisfied. We would have liked more trophies of course, but for a manager to survive that long at any club, never mind a significant club like Aberdeen, takes a lot.
And we had consistent high finishes in the league, European football and delivered the prize money and transfer profits that helped build a training ground
I do think I was deserving a bit more of a regard but good people within the game recognise what we did at Aberdeen. Umpteen managers had tried it before me and had not made any headway.
People remember how it finished but Aberdeen was such a rewarding experience for me and my family.
We loved the place and loved the club. I hope people recognise that.
After leaving, I was prepared to hold my nerve and play the long game. I spoke to a few senior people to gauge their reaction but I had already come to the rationale that I wanted to do this (Kilmarnock job).
I don’t need to work from a financial point of view but you are conscious of the fact you don’t want to be away from the coal face for too long.
I don’t think I was quite at that stage but it feels good to get going again.
Killie have taken a leap of faith with me — and vice versa. I feel privileged