WHAT DO YOU think of SECOND JOBS FOR OUR MPs
I CAN think of a few second jobs MPs should be allowed to have, and none of them involve a month in the British Virgin Islands advising rich f** kers on how to “engage” with the taxman.
Take that Liz Kendall, one of the Leicester MPs. She’s quite fit, so I could see her doing some lingerie modelling.
Boris Johnson is probably busy enough hurriedly pulling his dripping cock out of all and sundry, but he’d probably still delight in moonlighting as a ladies- only bouncy castle.
LOCAL councillors do pretty much the same thing as MPs but get a pitiful annual allowance rather than an £ 80,000 salary.
They spend seven days a week getting harassed about dog shit and litter and broken playground see- saws, but only get around £ 9,000- a- year plus a few expenses.
My councillor is a bus driver and once he’s done he starts again in the evenings, attending mind- numbing meetings about the lack of diversity among wheelie bins.
I’D like to see more MPs taking part in community initiatives like litter picking, working in food banks, and mending old ladies’ guttering.
But what would end up happening is they’d just tell someone else to pick up the litter and eat the food bank food themselves.
And once they were full, they’d ask the old ladies if they’d ever considered leaving everything in their will to the Tory Party.
CAN you imagine turning up at work one day to find Nicola Sturgeon trying to sit at the next desk to you?
She’s so tiny she’d need a f** king stepladder to reach the seat and then probably blame the height of the seat on the Englishman who made it.
Then you’d ask her if she’d like a cup of tea, and she’d snarl back: “Och, noooo. I want eeen- dee- pen- dence. And a mucccch betterer hairrr- dressererrr.”
YOU have to feel some sympathy for MPs after Brexit, because now they actually have to do their jobs for once, instead of leaving it all to Brussels while they earn zillions in the City. At least they have loads of staff they can put the workload onto while they still get to enjoy subsidised food and drink in the Commons restaurants and bars.
That Leeds MP Richard Burgon could make a fortune outside of Westminster. He’d rake it in as a Bagpuss lookalike.