HITLER’S GREAT GRANDSON SHAT ON MY SUN LOUNGER
WHATEVER you think of Adolf Hitler, most people agree he was a troublemaker.
And it seems the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, because the controversial German statesman’s GREAT- GRANDSON is causing a REICH palaver in Grimsby.
Paul Gruber has made neighbours’ lives a misery since moving into a tidy semi in the West Ravendale area of the famous fishing town two years ago.
In that time:
His front LAWN has gone unmowed
BINS have been placed at the end of his drive on the wrong day
COUNTRY music has blasted out until after nine at night
VISITORS have been seen “coming and going”
And now the 49- year- old stands accused of SHITTING on his next door neighbour’s SUN LOUNGER.
War
Neighbour Ron Jenkins raged: “We’re very much live and let live in this street and we welcome anyone, even if their great- grandfather was widely blamed for starting the war.
“But this chap has made absolutely no effort to fit in.
“He refuses to join the residents’ group and when we got a petition going after the council wanted to move in some, well… you know, he refused to sign it.
“Then I came home the other day after a trip to Farmfoods, and there it was. A stinking pile of dirt on my ruddy sun lounger.
“And I’d only re- varnished it the week before.
“I knew straight away who’d done it so I went round and said, ‘ You’ve shat on my sun lounger!’
“He said, bold as brass, ‘ No I didn’t, Mr Jenkins’. Have you ever heard such lip? If I was 10 years younger I’d have boxed his ears.”
Ron said that while he has no proof moustachioed Gruber shat on his sun lounger it “stands to reason”.
Last night Mr Gruber ADMITTED to Sunday Sport that he is the great- grandson of Hitler but DENIED soiling the sun- lounger.
Romance
Mr Gruber said his grandmother was the result of a brief romance between a young Adolf, recently returned from the First World War, and a Munich shopgirl.
He added: “Being related to Hitler means that you get blamed for pretty much everything. I’m used to it.”