It’s spick and span for a man in a van

A man in a van whose name

was Dan Met a man with a pan whose

name was Stan. ‘May I borrow your pan,

please?’ Dan asked Stan. ‘There’s something wrong

with my little white van. I’ve got to pick up my friend

Anne’s divan And help her deliver it to

her gran, But it’s hot enough to give me

a tan.’ ‘Oh Dan,’ said Stan, ‘what can

we do with my pan? Wouldn’t it be cannier to use

a can?’ ‘But Stan,’ said Dan, ‘it’s so

hot in my van, And where on earth shall we

find a can? All that I can see is your

lovely blue pan.’ ‘That’s true,’ said Stan, ‘we

need a handyman Who can really make your

van spick and span.’

Just then Dan caught a sight

of old Nan. ‘I wonder if Nan has the right

sort of can?’ ‘Let’s ask her,’ said Stan. ‘I

know about Nan,

And if anyone can find the

best can, she can.’ ‘Dear Nan,’ asked Dan, ‘do

you have a spare can? It’s so terribly hot in my little

white van.’ ‘Oh dear, Dan,’ said Nan, ‘I do

have a can, But right now it’s full of a

whole lot of bran And I’m hoping to use it to

bake a flan. If your van is hot, I can lend

you a fan.’ ‘Thanks, Nan,’ said Dan, ‘that’s

a very good plan;

We can try your fan instead of

a can.’ So Nan got her fan and all

three of them ran To see if the fan would cool

down the van. ‘Oh no!’ said Dan. ‘There’s a

council man And he’s giving the front of

my van a scan. I do hope it isn’t a parking ban.’ ‘Now, sir,’ said the man, ‘do

you own this van? I’ve been watching it since

my shift began, And you can’t park a van for

such a long span.’ ‘Look here,’ said Dan, ‘this is

my friend Stan, Who’s helping me to fix up

my van; We were hoping this fan we

borrowed from Nan Would cool the van in place of

a can.’ ‘Oh no,’ said the man, ‘you

don’t need a fan, It’s a pan you want, much

more than a can; You can do all sorts of things

with a pan.’ ‘May I borrow your pan, please?’ Dan asked Stan.

Tully Potter, Tonbridge, Kent.