Time to embrace turning 40

AS I approach 40 in a few weeks’ time I’m full of dread, honestly, I’ve been battling this feeling for about a year now, I think I may have been having a bit of a midlife crisis about it all.

I can’t pinpoint one thing that has contributed to this feeling of utter dread.

I imagine it’s a complete combination of things, however at the root of it I think it’s just that I do not want to get old.

It’s terribly negative I know, and I’ve been told to embrace this new stage of my life by many people but a voice in my head keeps telling me “You’re past it, what are you going to do now?”.

It’s like I’m at a crossroads with so many things and the confusion is wrapped tightly around all of me so much so that on some days I feel suffocated by my own thoughts.

Getting older isn’t just about what’s going on in your head though.

I can see myself aging, the lines around the corner of my eyes, the dark hairs that sprout out everywhere now!

A friend told me the other day that she has a pair of tweezers tucked away in her car mirror for those days when a random hair just appears on the bottom of her chin! We are surrounded by massive advertising campaigns telling us we can turn back time and look like our 20-something self again IF we buy this product or that product and the truth is most women fall for it, I know I have in the past.

We will do anything to look younger, anything to defy the ageing process, anything to help us beat time whilst men get to enjoy the ageing process, they get to be praised for looking more distinguished, and more defined.

The recent story about supermodel Linda Evangelista claiming to have been left permanently ‘deformed’ after having a fat freezing cosmetic procedure, has got women everywhere talking.

My first thought was “Why would she ever let anyone touch her face, she is one of the most beautiful women in the world?” but then Linda like all of us has aged, she is 56 and not the spring chicken she once was when she was gracing the catwalks alongside Cindy Crawford and co.

Linda’s story highlights the pressures every woman out there is facing as they age - we are surrounded by a world which is constantly telling us to look slimmer, to look younger, to look better, to hide our age like we should feel ashamed of who we are.

The difference in how older women are perceived and treated compared to older men is sad and deeply disturbing and whilst we all try to conform, fit in, and adhere to what society expects of us, we are giving in, and nothing will change.

As we age, we become wiser, we are accomplished, we’ve raised families, we’ve multi tasked the hell out of life, we have so many strings attached to our bow it’s unreal and we are beautiful, the lines we have tell a story, along with everything else even if parts of us are starting to droop slightly.

I guess maybe it is time to embrace turning 40 and everything that comes with it from the indecisiveness and worry to the random sprouting chin hair!