Busted flush? It’s Best if we just have a bit of gentle craic
CLUBS in administration, a Europa League final too far away to afford, rip-off flights, Bury’s unpaid players, the usual Fifa foolery, the pressure of the EFL play-offs…
I could easily write about any one of these serious issues but, I’ll level with you, it is the end of the season and I am in need of some light relief.
It is like Brexit coverage. Yes, it is hugely important, but sometimes it becomes so overwhelming that I just need to go on to YouTube and watch videos of people falling over.
So, I give you 500 words of fanciful fluff, in the hope that it leaves you with a smile on your face.
This week, a George Best
statue was unveiled in Belfast to mark what would have been his 73rd birthday, and it has caused much discourse and kerfuffle.
Now, I have no artistic talent whatsoever and the beauty of art is that it’s open to interpretation, so I don’t go along with those who think it resembles Pat Jennings, Kevin Keegan, Kevin Bacon or Columbo.
Judge for yourself but, to my untrained eye, it does look like George but instead of resembling one of the most handsome men ever born, I see a demented, Zombie version of Bestie, who has returned to earth in the year 2076 to wage war on those who have taken his name in vain.
The real George Best hails from east Belfast, whereas this George Best looks like he grew up in Middle Earth. Tony Currie, the undoubtedly talented artist in question, said he wanted to capture the footballer and not the pretty boy, and he has certainly succeeded on that front. This George Best would be lucky to bed Mrs Brown, never mind Miss World.
Some said he was the fifth Beatle but in this case he looks more like the sixth member of Spandau Ballet!
Seriously, I’m not slating the artist and I actually don’t mind it. I am just having a bit of gentle craic, and on the list of footballer statues, this is far from at the bottom.
The most infamous is probably the Ronaldo bust in Madeira that is the spitting image of Sloth from The Goonies, and by merely mentioning it, Metro Sport can print a picture of it so we can all have another good old chuckle.
And even that is not the funniest depiction of a footballer. I give you Mo Salah, unveiled in Sharm alSheikh last year, and instead of the Liverpool and Egyptian King, we got Seventies singing star Leo Sayer. That is, if Leo Sayer was actually a troll doll.
From the Alan Shearer statue that bore a likeness to Dale Winton to the original Ted Bates sculpture that took after Wee Jimmy Krankie, there’s something about football figures and statues that often don’t mix, but long may they keep being erected.
Yes, there are more important things going on in the sporting world, but sometimes you just have to laugh, right?