Flavour of Rome for this deluded mighty

The meeting of RBWM’s Corporate Overview and Scrutiny panel on March 25 was a strange affair.

There were zero Neros and not a fiddle in site, yet the whiff of Rome burning around the palaces of the deluded mighty was thick in the air.

The first two and a half hours were given over to consider the Council Plan 20242028, a pious combination of bureaucratic double speak and lachrymose sentimentality.

Hilariously, at the end of much pontification no one could remember what had been said so no resolution could be drafted on the night.

Cllr Howard pointed out that they could all have been at home having a nice night’s sleep instead.

That alternative would certainly have served the residents better than the immemorable blasts of hot air that he and the other panellists served up.

There then followed an item entitled ‘Inequalities Project and Think

Family’ which was so baffling that not even the presenting officer could make sense of his own slides.

He dried so badly that mere prompting from the wings could not solve his difficulties. His stand-in had to take over.

I hope the young man recovers from a nasty case of stage fright.

Yet, when it finally came time to consider a looming c.£2million gap in the 2024/25 Budget all the administration stooges rallied and found their ‘A’ game.

Operation ‘Close Our Eyes, Cover Our Ears and Pray’ was trotted out again and, despite the brave efforts of Cllr Maureen Hunt, the inconvenient facts were conveniently ignored.

Cllr Julian Tisi, was bold enough to dismiss it as a ‘storm in a tea cup’.

Well, it’s closer to a typhoon in a swimming pool and will be more than enough to sink his feeble little boat.

Still, one good thing did emerge.

New world’s records were set for mentioning ‘KPIs’, ‘granularity’ and ‘light touch, right touch’, so the three hours, forty minutes and fifty seconds weren’t entirely wasted.

I despair.

JOHN BALDWIN

Boyn Hill