MN YXYp `j jf jn\\k

our new faux fillet? It’s delicious. No it’s not. It’s not even steak and is made from minced mice, but because we’ve “upgraded” we feel better.

I’m surprised Volkswagen haven’t joined the upgrade frenzy. After all, it’s the perfect word for their insultingly misspelled motor the VW up! which comes complete with a lowercase letter U and weird exclamation mark for something which is clearly not an exclamation.

Slow

Last time I drove an Up (that’s the right way, VW) was in 2012. I tested a 60hp version and reported that it was “so diabolically slow you could find yourself being overtaken by a Volvo towing a caravan”.

To be fair VW produced a 75hp version of the same little three-cylinder engine that made driving the Up actually bearable, but the new 2017 range includes a 90hp turbo that is startlingly good fun.

And why not? After all, sticking a 90hp engine into a car that weighs just 1,000kg is a bit like swapping your barbecue briquettes for fireworks. OK, it’s not semtex on a skateboard (a 266hp, 506kg, Caterham R500) but you would be surprised by what the 90hp VW Up has to offer.

The extra power makes it great fun at traffic lights, where this little Up shoots off as soon as they turn green.

Drivers are amazed, too, when the car pulls away effortlessly from them at high speed on the motorway.

You can imagine people thinking that the driver must be nailing the accelerator pedal through the car’s floor and that the noise, instability