Problem of estranged adult children

I WAS greatly delighted to read Helen Carroll’s article on parental estrangement (Mail). As a psychotherapist and estranged mother myself, I know this is still a taboo topic — but it is reaching epidemic proportions and can no longer be ignored. Many younger counsellors and social media encourage this behaviour, which is devastating to parents and families. It should be stopped whenever possible.

alexiS pfeiffer, london nW7 I rEAD helen Carroll’s article about estranged adult children with a sense of dread.

I was cut off for years by one of my children. the reason was money borrowed that I was promised would be repaid and never was. After 12 years, I had the nerve to suggest it was time to repay the money. It wasn’t a huge amount but I needed it. the request was met with indignation and nastiness from my adult child and I was cut off, even though I’d been diagnosed with an incurable illness.

I tried to establish contact for years until, out of the blue, I was contacted when a relationship broke down. since then we have gradually formed a relationship ourselves but I still feel I have to walk on eggshells and the money owed has never been mentioned. I think there was a lot of resentment that my children grew up without a father, who left years before. to this day, I carry the hurt of my estrangement from my child and realise it could happen again.

name and address supplied MERCILESS teasing was the best way to deal with errant parental behaviour in my day. Both the adult children quoted in Helen’s article appeared to be cowed by their parent’s behaviour and lacked self-awareness to see how to steer around this.

The woman who thought her wedding day was the biggest day of her life came across as shallow and spoilt. Haven’t her happy marriage and three healthy children surpassed that?

name and address supplied