Fishing for compliments
AS he approached the Pacific isle of Owariki, the presenter of TRIBES, PREDATORS & ME (BBC2) was given an unwelcoming welcome. “Who told you to come?” roared one man in traditional Solomon Islands’ dress. “You are on my island!”
This was all, apparently, just for show, though and Father Matthew, who seemed to be the chief of this tiny islet (more on that later) formally welcomed wildlife cameraman and presenter Gordon Buchanan, declaring him a brother.
What followed was an enjoyable hour of Gordon trying to master spear fishing, trying to conquer his terror of sharks and trying to understand why this unique island life was threatened. There was enough in there, from the sheer beauty of the underwater footage to the delight of the islanders when Gordon gave a village screening, for a story to be unnecessary.
They gave us one, though, suggesting that Gordon was a burden on the community until he could catch fish. As the, er, tension mounted and everyone got hungrier, one of his hosts, Moses, became increasingly surly. Maybe it all really happened like that but it seemed more likely that, in order to get permission to film on this tiny island of scarce resources, Gordon would have showed up with a sack of rice and a crate of pilchards.
If he didn’t, then perhaps we’d all misunderstood those “greetings”, and perhaps that angry “Who told you to come?” meant something more like “Where’s the shopping?”
The fish were the centre of everything, a vital protein source, ever scarcer due to the industrial trawlers and somehow vanishing because everyone was slaughtering sharks to sell their fins for cash.
At the end, Gordon attended a gathering of chiefs, who resolved to ban the shark trade and preserve the traditional systems of magic and worship surrounding the magnificent beasts. This was great, although we were startled to learn that these were not chiefs of other islands, just the chiefs of Owariki, less than a mile across, population 809. With so many chiefs, you’ll need magic to achieve anything.
SAFE HOUSE (ITV) was another show where the hospitality came with question marks. When we met them, ex-cop Tom (Stephen Moyer) and partner Sam (Zoe Tapper) were facing a lean winter in their remote guesthouse by the sea.
Fortunately, a serial killer with a wigwam fetish had just struck, abducting a dental nurse from Liverpool. Tom was catching that ferry ’cross the Mersey quicker than a ferret, elbowing onto the crime scene and reminding his former colleagues that this was the M.O. of The Crow, a killer he’d trailed eight years ago. Moreover, Tom hinted, the Crow’s real victims had been the vanished women’s grieving relatives, many of whom died soon after.
You’d think, then, that sending John (Ashley Walters) and Dani (Sacha Parkinson), the family of the latest woman, back home and keeping them under surveillance, would be an excellent way of trapping the killer.
Not according to Tom. What they needed was to stay in a remote guesthouse by the sea. He knew of just such a guesthouse, fortunately, and it had just been certified as a safe house by the police.
The family seemed reluctant but someone sent John on a wild goose chase, texting him photos of Dani to show him how close the danger was. Hoteliers do struggle offseason but this was going a bit far.