I wonder how the French ref responded
Iwas wondering the other day, how do you guys decide on referees to be appointed to your international panel, and especially those who officiate at the Rugby World Cup?
There must be some sort of qualification standard and, perhaps, you even have a test to determine who is suitable for the job. If that is the case, I expect it goes something like this:
Question 1: Are you able to run for 80 minutes without… a) Coughing up a lung? b) Having an asthma attack? c) Pulling a hamstring?
Question 2: Are you able to blow a whistle… a) Without swallowing it? b) Whistle? What’s a whistle? c) No, but I can whistle in the bath
Question 3: If a prop keeps losing his bind and dropping his elbow to the ground, do you… a) Ignore it? b) Ignore it? c) Ignore it? Question 5: In the event of a blatantly high, late tackle, do you… a) Pretend you didn’t see it? b) See it and deem it legal? c) See it and ignore it? Question 5: If a player blatantly lies on the ball and makes no effort to move, do you…
a) Drag him away to allow the opposition to get possession?
b) Give him a break because rugby is a tiring game and players are entitled to take a “rest” every now and again?
c) Make the “pretty gutless” decision to ignore it?
Question 6: What is your understanding of policing of the breakdown?
a) If there is no policeman in the vicinity, I call the AA to take care of the broken down vehicle; b) Anything goes c) Huh? Question 7: When do you use a yellow card? And a red one?
a) You mean you don’t give me an ace? b) I’d fold c) Yellow for birthdays and red for Christmas
Question 8: Have you ever studied the laws of the game? a) No b) I skimmed over them
c) I prefer to interpret things as I see them
Question 9: Are you aware you have assistant referees to help you during a match? a) I thought they were ball-boys b) You mean the guys with the flags? c) Is that what they are? Question 10: When arriving at a stadium to officiate in a match, where do you leave your white stick and is there someone to look after your guide dog?
World Rugby thanks you for participating and wishes you all the best of luck in your efforts to become one of the most despised individuals on the planet.