Cute baby posts enrage Facebook ‘friends’
Perth mom gets a disturbing response to daily social media updates on six-month-old daughter
PROUD mom Jade Ruthven thought her Facebook posts about her darling daughter, Addison, would delight family and friends around the globe.
To capture “Addy’s milestones”, she posted one or two pictures of the six-month-old toddler on her Facebook page every day without fail.
She could never have imagined the reaction.
The cute portraits irked her Facebook friends so much that “a few of the girls” penned a scathing letter to her.
The anonymous letter posted to her home in Perth, Australia, read: “We are all so over your running commentary of your life and every single thing Addy does.
“Look, we all have kids that we are besotted with — guess what — every parent thinks their kid is the best ever. But we don’t ram it down everyone else’s neck!!! She wears a new outfit — well take a photo and send it PRIVATELY to the person who gave it to her — not to everyone!!! She crawls off the mat — we DON’T care!!! She’s 6 months old — BIG DEAL!!!
“We can’t wait for you to get back to work — maybe you won’t have time to be on Facebook quite so much.”
In her defence, said Ruthven, most of the postings were for relatives and friends around the world.
Her husband, Ryan, was born in Cape Town and they have many friends in South Africa, New Zealand, Thailand, the UK and the US.
“Most of them have not even met Addy yet, so Facebook is the easiest way for them to see what she is up to and the milestones she has hit,” Ruthven told the Sunday Times.
Social media law specialist Emma Sadleir described the letter writers as “meanies” who should have un-friended or unfollowed Ruthven if they did not want to see her posts.
“She is not doing anything illegal or wrong,” she said.
“Maybe this is a catalyst for us to start thinking about what and how much we post about our children. A lot of people do post too much.
“From a legal point of view, there is no prohibition on uploading pictures of your children, except pictures where your children are naked.
“Children have a greater right to privacy. I always say less is more and manage your child’s digital footprint,” said Sadleir.
Arthur Goldstuck, a media and communications technology analyst, saw it differently.
“Clearly she is oversharing with the world,” he said.
“This is a common situation . . . People have to select what they want the world to see.
“If it’s only for family and close friends, then they should set it for them only. You need to share what is representative or what’s best or what’s interesting — not everything. The biggest frustration for one’s friends is when you upload your whole camera roll.
“She would not have been OK with someone telling her it’s not OK and therefore they did it anonymously. Everyone else also has children and if everyone else was sharing at that level people would completely switch off,” said Goldstuck.
The letter from Ruthven’s friends went viral after she shared it with comedian and TV personality Em Rusciano, who posted it online, soliciting users’ views.
Ruthven, 33, a dental hygienist, said she shook with anger when she received the letter.
“I don’t think this could be from a very close friend as they would know that I was not going to cry in a corner and take myself off Facebook.
“I have received over 500 messages on Facebook from strangers all over the world sending their support. This has made me realise I’m not a bad mom or person for wanting to show off my beautiful daughter.”
Ryan said: “Facebook has many options for one to hide or remove feeds one doesn’t wish to view. Why couldn’t they have done that?”
Ruthven’s “friends” may just get that reprieve they have been hoping for — the new mother returns to work on Tuesday.