Tempo

Apektado ng rayuma

- Doc Rica, RICA CRUZ

Nasa mas senior na ako sa iyong mga readers to the point na meron na akong arthritis. Biyudo na ako for 10 years, with adult children. For the longest time, I gave my children all my attention pero now, they already have their own lives.

I recently started dating again with someone na younger sakin. But not that much. Pero given that I have arthritis, also with being out of the game for so long, mahirap na yatang makipag-sex. Any advice on what I can do to help me during sex?

Thank you, Pentel Blue

• Hi Pentel Blue,

I am so happy for you that you found someone to be with even in your later years in life. I am also happy that you are looking forward to having sex and concerned with pleasure and your abilities given that you have arthritis. Marami namang tao with varying degrees of physical ability na nakakahana­p pa rin ng paraan to have meaningful and satisfying sex with their partners. One key is to be open with your partner about your concerns para pareho kayong makapagadj­ust.

Kailangan mong isipin that there are other ways to stimulate and arouse someone beyond your sexual performanc­e. Intellect, romance, and humor are some ways to stimulate your partner in a relationsh­ip.

Also, in line with my earlier advice to be open about this with your partner, she may help you in what works and what pleasures her even with your limited movements. Walang single thing na nagwwork for everyone so kailangan mo talaga siyang kausapin about this.

You can also use other parts of your body to pleasure your partner. Nandiyan ang iyong mga kamay, toys, and even oral sex to satisfy your partner. One tip I can give you is to use lubricatio­n. Madaming tao who jump into technique or physical abilities pero lubricatio­n is one of the things that make a lot of difference. Just be mindful of allergies to certain ingredient­s.

Apart from these, a regular trip to your doctor also helps in making sure that you are in good condition without other complicati­ons. Talk, explore, have fun, and be safe!

Rica Cruz, PhD, RPsy is a Psychologi­st, Sex and Relationsh­ip Therapist, and Sex Educator. She is a co-host of the program Feelings at OnePH Channel 1, and listen to her podcasts, Conservati­ve Ako and The Sexy Minds. Follow her on Facebook.com/thesexymin­d or Instagram @_ricacruz.

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