His own man
His name is often whispered about. Just like the rest of his family, Ferdinand “Bongbong” Marcos Jr. is a figure that often elicits different kinds of reactions, depending which camp one belongs to.
The embattled former senator dropped by the Daily Tribune
and gave a glimpse of the man who everyone purports to know.
In TribuneNow’s “Spotight” interview with Dinah Ventura and Jojo Silvestre, he revealed his thoughts as a father to three boys, husband to a lovely miss from a rival family and son to the late President Ferdinand Marcos.
He shared about his growing up years, starting from his high school days at La Salle to his college life, including his stint as part of a union of musicians and artists during his stay in London. He also revealed how he has developed a “bullshit detector” early on in his life, given the circumstance of his birth. He also answers that one, intriguing question that haunts him to this day: “Is he the real Bongbong Marcos?”
Find out more about the man and the myth of Bongbong Marcos.
Daily Tribune (DT): How are you as a father and a husband?
Bongbong Marcos (BBM): I don’t know if I’m the person to ask, but I try very hard to. Well, let me start with the kids. I always treated my kids as little adults. I never baby-talked to them. It irritates me and I know that it’s not a good idea to teach children how to be childish — not childlike — but childish. So, I’ve always spoken to them like normal people. I’ve always treated them like little grown-ups and that seems to have worked. I have three boys, and they’ve grown up to be fairly independent young men. So, I think that that’s probably the way to do it. But of course, you read all the books on how to raise children and on parenting and they do help a little bit but, in the end, you’re making it up as you go along. So, I guess I’m still doing that.
(Mrs. Marcos) claims that I’m the disciplinarian but I don’t think so, I think my children are much more afraid of her. Well, she’s the mom. She makes sure that everyone’s okay, that nobody’s sick, they’re getting fed, that the rooms are clean and their clothes are laundered etc., they’re properly dressed for the occasion, all of those mom-things.
My eldest is already 25 years old. His name is Alexander Ferdinand, so we call him Sandro. My second is Joseph Simon, we call him Si, and my youngest is Vincent who we call Vinnie for some reason. So anyway, they are young men already, at this point para na lang kaming magkaibigan, magkabarkada (we’re like friends, buddies). We argue about music. We argue about movies.
DT: How do you bond as a family?
BBM: My youngest, Vincent, is still in school in Singapore, and the two boys, Sandro and Simon, are very busy. Sandro is working with Congressman Martin Romualdez in the majority floor leader’s office, while Simon is revving up to be a trader, so he’s busy. All kinds of trading, that’s where he found an interest in. Now, we find each other on the weekends. They all live very nearby, but they’re busy too. At that age, madami silang ginagawa (they do a lot of things). So, I’m hoping we’ve instilled in them enough, in the time that they were living with us. The basic relationship is solid. I hope so.
DT: How was Ferdinand Marcos as a father?
BBM: First of all, growing up, we really hardly ever saw him. (Actually) both of them, my parents. They were always so busy. We hardly ever saw them, my parents. So busy. Even when I left for the UK in 1970 and then my sisters followed. Mula noon we didn’t really sit along as a family but we spent as much time as we could with the five of us and, immediately, I remember, my mother would look around (and remark), ‘Uy, lima tayo, patawagan niyo lahat ng photographer.’ (It is) because it’s so rare that we’re together, so she’s like, ‘Okay, put on your barong and everybody sit down. We’re going to have a formal picture.’ But nevertheless, we had some very close moments with my family.
I guess because we knew that we couldn’t make babad or chill because my parents were so busy that later in time when we’re together we really took full advantage of. We’d catch up on each other.
My father as a dad was one of the most hilarious people. People didn’t see that side of him. And he was always busy, we’d have to drag him out of the office, but once when he’s with us, marami siyang kwento (he has lots of stories), ‘This is what happened, this is what we did, as a matter of fact come with me, we’re going to this.’ Pero syempre nung maliit pa kami it was a little easy. I remember when we were still living in San Juan, my dad, although he was very busy, kahit na may lakad sa probinsya, sinasama kami lagi (even if he had out-of-town engagements, he would take us along). He would bring us everywhere. We used to tease my father about these failed expeditions that he would organize. Like ‘Oh you have to see this’ and, of course, presidente siya (he’s the President), so he would have this one battalion of people to go up there. So, nonetheless we had fun. We were all very close because we were just the five of us in the palace. Everybody else was not family.
Do you remember your friends? BBM:
Sure, they’re still the friends that I have now. My classmates from La Salle. I am technically class ’74, out of La Salle Greenhills, but I did not attend high school anymore in La Salle. But they kept me as an honorary member because malapit kami eh, we’re close. The friends that I made in La Salle are still the same friends that I have, and I still keep in touch with many of my friends that were with me in school and in university in England. So, because if you remember, even the friends I made out of school, I made many of them outside the Philippines, so it was slightly different from making friends when you’re here in the Philippines, because you’re all together, you do normal things — you wash the dishes, you cook, clean the house etc. — all of those things that I would never have done, at least together with other people, had I not traveled abroad, I had not studied.
You must learn how to do these, that’s why I sent my sons to the same school I went to. So that they become independent, and that’s one thing I learned from Worth School — they teach their students how to become a gentleman. You’re well-bred, well-educated and well-trained, you know how to take care of yourself, you don’t need to depend on other people.
DT: There’s this controversial thing. They were saying that’s not the Bongbong anymore. How did you react to that?
BBM: I was astounded when I first heard it. Because coming from my point of view, I couldn’t understand. ‘Bakit nila sasabihin ‘yun? (Why do they say that?)’ You know the story, right? I got into a fight in England, nasaksak ako, basta (I sustained a knife wound) somehow, I was killed. And my parents, instead of burying me, in an honorable fashion found an avatar to take my place, and what you see now is not the one who was born to my mother, but actually a replacement.
First of all, I don’t understand what parent would do that. Why would a parent do that? I’ve been in the public life since I was three years old. Look at the pictures, nothing’s changed. Unfortunately, there’s no improvement. It’s still the same. Everything. But some people are saying, ‘Well, if it’s not true, do a DNA test. It’s easier to disprove and approve, right?’ I said, ‘No, I like being part of an urban legend. It’s okay.’
DT: Did you have any guardians in England?
BBM: No, I was in boarding school. The ambassador was my guardian. Just so that there was a legal guardian, yes. It was Jaime Zobel for the most part of the time that we were there, but, no, I was in school. I was just a student. Okay lang ‘yun, I was totally immersed in what they call the ‘English public school.’
DT: Tell us about your romantic life.
BBM: Let me be clear, I have no romantic life outside of Liza. You know, I found the right girl and married her, so that’s it.
We were in New York for my mother’s trial, one of our lawyers was Liza’s best friend in Ateneo Law, and Liza at the time was practicing in New York. So nung lumipat kami, our lawyer said come and meet my friend, we’re going to have drinks. So, we went, and said hi, hi, and that’s how we met. But nothing really happened. I was going back to Hawaii and then to San Francisco, so I was flying in and out of New York. So we’d see each other but nothing specific. We started going out maybe after a year, because we were both busy. There were so many things that we have to deal with. She was very busy, but she would visit us in court. She would come and visit, and she would make kwento with us and with her friend kasi kilala ko na siya.
DT: Did it matter that she is related to Pedro Cojuangco?
BBM: Well, we’re in New York, so we didn’t really talk about that. But her family was not exactly pro-Marcos. She tells me stories of her demonstrating in Ayala. I think it didn’t matter to me or to us. It seemed to matter to her family. There were members of her family who wouldn’t speak to me or even say my name. We’re all friends now, of course. But you know, that’s not something that I’m not accustomed to.
DT: I’m just curious. You had friends who became your enemies or critics. How did you react to that?
BBM: I think my instincts growing up, as my mother’s son and as my father’s son, all the three of us actually, natuto na kami malayo pa lang na, ‘Ay, hindi tunay yan,’ ‘May kailangan lang yan,’ ‘Nagpapa-cute lang yan kasi may kailangan yan.’ (We learned early on. ‘That one’s fake.’ ‘He just needs something from us.’ ‘He’s making an effort because he wants something from us’). We developed a bullshit detector really early on in our lives. And so, yung mga balimbing, medyo expected and not surprising. Talagang magba-balimbing yan kasi mahina yan eh. (We already know who are going to turn against us. We’ve expected that and it’s not surprising. These kinds will really switch camps because they’re weak). Those were not surprising. And I’m happy to say that those who I considered as my friends, who I’ve had a relationship with, remained my friends.
If there’s one thing that the events of 1986 will do, it will teach you who your friends are kasi talagang ipitan na eh (because it was a tough and challenging time). Who would take a risk for you, who would still continue to support you, but, you know, you also have to be forgiving. People have families. People have lives. It’s a bit much sometimes to ask them everything for your own welfare. It means you’re on your own.
DT: How are you with the Aquinos?
BBM: I don’t really know them at all. Imee knows some of Ninoy Aquino’s children because when my father was a senator, they would be together and would bring their children, so she had the chance to meet them. But Irene and I did not have that chance to know them. People were always surprised that at the time of the presidency of Noynoy (Aquino), I spoke to him maybe once or three times. That’s all. I’ve never been in the same room as Cory Aquino. So, I don’t know. When we went to visit her at the wake, I met some of the other siblings but that’s it. We never really were in contact with each other also because had to leave. That was in the ‘70s. High school palang ako umalis na ako. No, there wasn’t much of a chance for that to develop.
DT: I heard that you play the saxophone.
BBM: I did. Well, I don’t practice anymore but I can still make noise, it’s not very good na. (But in the past) I could play. I wanted to study music. I wanted to study music for a long time. I studied and learned many instruments. It started with a flute, I played in an orchestra, after that I learned the saxophone. I learned the clarinet. I even learned how to play a bassoon, can you imagine? But that was a long time ago.
DT: What do you listen to now?
BBM: I listen to jazz. I listen to rock. I listen to the music that I grew up with. I was actually a member of equity, which is the union of musicians and actors (in Oxford) because we played in a pub, and if you get paid you have to be a member of equity. (Getting paid) is a technical thing.
DT: What’s your new year’s wish for yourself?
BBM: My new year’s wish is pretty much the same: Be better. Open your mind, work even harder. Be more compassionate, yet be tougher at the same time. But really just be better in everything that you do so that you’ll last another six weeks (laughs). Hopefully, it’ll last longer than that.
DT:
DT: What’s your message to the Filipino people?
BBM: Magkaisa tayo. Hindi gaganda ang buhay dito sa Pilipinas. Hindi titibay ang lipunan kung hindi tayo magkakaisa. Ito ang unang kailangan para maging matagumpay ang estado. (Let us work together. Life in the Philippines will not improve, our society will not be strong if we do not unite. This is the first thing we need to have a successful state.)