Snap, little crackle and no pop
The best thing about Dirty Laundry (TV One, Wednesdays) is its title. But if you think it’s a new programme on home shopping or a Fair Go item about a defective washing powder, think again.
Dirty Laundry’s another variation of Outrageous Fortune and Nothing Trivial about a hard as nails, dysfunctional family, living a lie.the Raffertys have snap, little crackle and no pop as mum (Jennifer Ward-lealand) brings up a family of four and finances their lives through money laundering. Just as she’s cooking dinner, the police raid her stucco home and arrest her on fraud and tax evasion charges.
The arrest provides an opportunity to meet the tribe – Leo, Bianca, Matt, Kat and Uncle Trevor. They sound like The Addams Family, but not quite. They’ve had a charisma bypass sometime in their lives. They’re damaged goods and all have issues.
Kat’s a lawyer, overlooked for promotion by her boss, Matt is going through a noisy and sometimes violent separation. Bianca has bought a house but now can’t finance it. Leo is a 14 year old appendage and dodgy Uncle Trevor has a dicky heart.
All have dirty laundry and, with the possible exception of Kat, have little humanity and less compassion but they are ideal for the series. This is about an Auckland family as far removed from reality as the 6pm news.
With Uncle Trevor in coronary care, Mum Rafferty, from the prison toilet, asks the kids to run the business. For about five minutes they have a moral dilemma then decide that someone has to do it.
‘‘Everything she’s done, she’s done for us,’’ Kat says and that’s enough reason for the family to launder a few more million.
Yet it’s a great story and rollicks along but leaves enough holes between bat and pad for the middle stump to be knocked over with every delivery. How can a family not know that Uncle Trevor is as bent as a Soviet sickle and mum, when she’s not cooking lasagne, is running an evil empire?
What’s more mum is boss of a knocking shop – the Hanky Panky Health and Massage Club – where only the seats get hard and the family has no clues.
If the writers got the idea from Francis Ford Coppola’s epic movie, The Godfather, then mum must be Godmother and the family, who takes over the reins, should muscle the episodes to achieve a more sinister and violent outcome. It might help.
At the moment it’s a romp – better than Auckland Housewives but worse than Wentworth.
The acting is passable. Jennifer Ward-lealand, a towering stage actress, is out of her depth as Donna Rafferty. On her performance, tax would evade her. Kat (Tai Berdinner-blades) has qualities that could see her become leader of the pack – the tax pack – and the talent of Uncle Trevor (Andy Anderson) is yet to be realised. He’s lying in bed competing with a nasal drip and bedpan.
Dirty Laundry could be worth watching next week if only to see how the family runs the empire and if there’s any hanky panky at the Hanky Panky.
Breakfast (TV One, Mondayfriday) has certainly improved with the introduction of Hilary Barry and Jack Tame. Hilary played a delicious role of humbling Paul Henry and warning him not to go too far. She now needs to find a similar persona with Jack Tame. They haven’t defined theirs yet and are scrapping for the camera.
Surely she can play the veteran anchor and remind the youthful Jack that he’s still driving with L plates.
I Want My Wife Back (UKTV Mondays) is delightful. It stars Ben Miller as Murray, a workaholic, who arranges a 40th birthday party for his wife Bex (Caroline Catz) only to be told she’s leaving him. It’s comedy without a mean bone in its body.
Murray is a daft version of Reggie Perrin while Catz, after being lumbered with Dr Martin, doubly deserves a doting husband but gets Murray instead.
This week I watched Kat and Catz and I know which one I preferred. Catz played the purr-fect role.