Doing good in life and death
There are not one but three silent mentors in the writer’s family. She pays tribute to them.
ON MAY19, we finally laid our beloved Mother, eldest sister Chris and younger sister Jaclyn to rest together. Never had I envisaged that this day would come when all three members of my beloved family would be lying in their respective caskets at the same final Gratitude and Send-off event.
All of them were i.silent Mentors who selflessly donated their bodies for the advancement of medical research, education and training. The wish of an i. Silent Mentor is to voluntarily donate their body for the good of others.
Established in 2012 by its chairman and founding director, Professor Dr Chin Kin Fah, the Academy For Silent Mentor (AFSM) promotes the Silent Mentor programme as not solely a medical initiative, as it is underpinned by empathy and compassionate teachings.
This is to benefit the participants, primarily medical students, in learning soft skills in a holistic environment. Its core purpose is for them to be better doctors for tomorrow with not just technical and competency skills, but also for them to be able to carry out their roles in an empathetic, compassionate and caring manner. So this will certainly benefit society at large, particularly those who require medical care.
The story of our beloved three i.silent Mentors began with Chris who met Prof Dr Chin by chance. Upon learning about the Silent Mentor programme from him in 2017, Chris did not hesitate to sign up, making her one of the earliest who registered – she was the 8th participant nationwide. And the first member of the family to do so. This reflected her gentle nature with strong values of compassion, selflessness and courage.
Subsequently, Chris enthusiastically introduced this programme to Jaclyn who was diagnosed with Stage 4 breast cancer. Jaclyn also did not think twice about signing up; she was the 16th participant nationwide. Both of them supported the Silent Mentor Programme by appearing in AFSM videos – in English and Mandarin – on Youtube.
Mum willingly followed suit and was the nation’s oldest participant at the ripe old age of 90. She was participant No.72.
The most memorable words of our beloved i.silent Mentors were: “Do good”, “together”, and hui chia (return home).
Jaclyn was the most popular i.silent Mentor, with the most number of mentees – a total of 1,013 medical students and practitioners. She was the “longest-serving” i.silent Mentor – seven years – since passing away in July 2017.
Mum passed away peacefully
nd in August 2020 due to old age. When asked by Prof Dr Chin as she lay bedridden if she truly wanted to remain as an i.silent Mentor, mum did not hesitate to reaffirm her wish. Not only did she want to do good but she desired to be together with her daughter Jaclyn who lay in the Academy For Silent Mentor.
Chris followed suit in 2023 with her final handwritten message expressing her wish to return home so she could pass away peacefully in her own home rather than in the hospital. She scrawled those final words with much effort – she had been diagnosed with Motor Neurone Disease (MND). This is a rare condition that progressively damages parts of the nervous system, leading to muscle weakness, often with visible wasting away.
Together, the three of them have “mentored” over 1,581 medical students and practitioners, excluding those who joined online from around the world.
Their selflessness, courage, compassion and high sense of altruism set the direction and values for our entire family to emulate as we move forward with our own life journeys. We are indeed so very proud of them.
Our I. Silent Mentors may not speak anymore, but their actions speak louder than words.
As we lay all three of our beloved i.silent Mentors to rest on their final journey together, we could almost hear them gently whisper to us, in the words of Winnie the Pooh:
“If there ever comes a day When we can’t be together Keep us in your heart We will stay there forever.”
Mum, sis Chris and Jaclyn, may you rest in eternal peace, knowing you have all done good, are together and have all returned home in heaven above. Be our guardian angels and guide us with your shining light. We will miss you always and we love you all till eternity.