Quotes OF THE WEEK

‘I believe in politics you must push the boat out. But maybe not in this way!’

Joan Burton, Tánaiste, after falling out of a boat into the water in Co. Kilkenny while she was visiting a flooded area

‘Now that the running repairs are done he will pass the NCT and will be good to go for another few decades.

Pat Kenny, on Gay Byrne, who had a heart attack during the week

‘A deliberate, malice aforethought, national brothelisation bill.’

Letter from a member of the public to President Patrick Hillary in 1985, released by the national archives this week, condemning the Health (Family Planning) Amendment Act, which allowed for the sale of condoms without prescription

‘Sinn Féin played him like a 3lb trout.’

Seamus Mallon, former SDLP deputy first minister, on how Sinn Féin treated SDLP leader John Hume during the Peace Process

‘You could grate a banana on my abs.’

Davina McCall, TV presenter, boasting about her fitness levels

‘He soaked up substances in quantities that would have anaesthetised a rhinoceros.’

Brian May, of Queen, pays tribute to Lemmy, the Motorhead rocker who died last week aged 70

‘As he saw me approaching, he threw the block through the shop window, and I said to myself: “Sorry old son, but unfortunately you are not getting away with that,” and jumped on him.’

Larry O’Gorman, All-Ireland-winning Wexford hurler, on how he tackled a man who was trying to rob a shop on St Stephen’s Day

‘I have often been at home watching a bad performance and think — oh my God, why the hell did I pick them?’

Kian Egan, on his judging decisions on The Voice Of Ireland