WISHFUL THINKING...
DR SHRIRANG BHAKLE dwells on the subject and also speaks about the different kinds of wishes that humans harbour
All of us have, literally, hundreds of wishes. “I wish my child does well in his career”, “I wish I’ll look good when I go for that function”, “I wish I get a lenient examiner”. There are so many more: ‘I wish my Mom and Dad don’t fight with each other”, “I wish I don’t get bedridden”, “I wish this lead character of this movie (or a serial) is able to fulfil her wish in the next episode”. The list of wishes is practically unending: ‘the wish to get that promotion’, ‘the wish to do some good for the unfortunate people’, ‘the wish to teach that person a lesson’, ‘the wish to eat chocolate ice cream with lots of nuts’, ‘the wish to kill the persons of the other community’ and so on and on and on.
How do we acquire all these hundreds of wishes? Are we born with all these wishes? Are they implanted in our minds by other people? Can we control what wishes we should have? We have many ‘instinctual’ wishes: wishes that are inborn. All the animals have these instinctual wishes, too. There are several types of these instinctual wishes. For example, consider the wish to eat and drink. The wish to enjoy sexual pleasure is an important instinctual wish necessary for the propagation of a species. The wish to enjoy ‘sensory’ pleasures (pleasures related to the different senses – eyes, ears, nose, tongue, skin etc.) is a huge category of wishes. The wish to avoid pain and discomfort is another instinctual wish.
We humans have the ‘wish to create’. We have created uncountable number of objects. But this ‘wish to create’ is not the exclusive property of humans alone. Many animals, birds and even insects have this ‘wish to create’. They, too, create their homes (nests) that are amazingly complex. Another basic wish is the ‘wish to possess(or own)’. Even the animals have the wish own a territory – a patch of land and the resources. They, too, valiantly defend their homelands from intruders!
We humans have a very important instinctual wish to get respect and love from others – family members and everyone around – at work, in the neighbourhood (local or online). For some, getting respect from others is so important that they may resort to violence to ensure respect for the leader. This is true, not only for the gorillas, but for some human leaders, too!
‘The wish to take revenge’, ‘the wish curiosity (wish to know)’, ‘the wish to play games’ and even the ‘wish to make others happy’ are instinctual wishes that can be seen even in animals. As can be seen, these instinctual wish categories are only a few. But how do all the hundreds of wishes that each of us has, arise?
Although the instinctual wishes are only a few, they get transformed into all the hundreds of wishes. Consider the simple instinctual ‘wish to eat’. Suppose you are hungry when visiting a friend. The friend serves you a new type of sweet dish. You relish it. Then and there, you have acquired a new wish: the wish to eat that particular type sweet dish. Similarly, you may have developed the wish to eat so many other types of recipes, too.
So, the single instinctual ‘wish to eat’ has got transformed into so many different wishes to eat so many types of foods. This was the result of you yourself enjoying the food first and then developing the wish.
Sometimes we develop a wish just by observing others enjoying something. Many of the ads use this method. You see an actor gulping a drink – glug, glug, glug – and then saying, “AAAAHH” with a broad smile of satisfaction on his face! Your instinctual desire to drink has just got transformed into ‘wish to drink and enjoy what that actor has enjoyed’! It’s not just kids who can be mesmerized like this.
Adults, too, can be made to develop different wishes by showing the enjoyment of others. In fact, all of us ‘promote’ different joys, pleasures, happinesses to people around, “Go to that Godman (or Godwoman), and you will find mental peace.” And so on.
Sometimes we acquire many wishes as ‘steps-wishes’. Let me explain. Suppose, a girl sees the Badminton world champion in action – playing against world opponents and winning and enjoying praises from all. So this girl develops the desire to be a champion like her. Thisresults in her developing many new wishes: wish to get up early, wish to practise hard, follow a diet and so on. So the basic ‘wish to be a champion’ resulted in all these wishes.
And thus, we acquire all the hundreds of wishes. I am sensing that you, the reader, has acquired a new wish: ‘the wish that I end this Wishipedia’. So, I think I should stop now!