Kids Who Cooperate
Creating a Culture of Cooperation
At the end of a long hard day no parent wants to be completely ignored after asking the kids to pick up their toys. And after making dinner and cleaning up, what parent wants to hear a resounding “no” when asking the kids if they’ve started on their homework? In an effort to encourage cooperative behaviour, parents often find themselves nagging, negotiating or employing tactics like bribery. But what’s really the answer to raising eager-to-help-out, cooperative kids? We’re giving you six great tips to increase your kids’ contributions at home and end the bitter battles!
Share Some Quality Time
Sure you’re busy. You may have to whisk the kids right off the school bus to be at gymnastics by 4:30. Or maybe you’ve worked a long, stressful day and you’re just too tired to really entertain the children by the time you get home. A fast paced life is the reality for today’s modern families, but spending time – real quality time - as a family might be the best weapon in your ‘ Mission Cooperation’ arsenal.
Kids are naturally inclined to want to please people that care about them; it’s in their nature. Spending quality bonding time with your kids is a must for fostering respect and cooperation (and for so many other reasons). Child and Youth Worker Kelly Price says that developing a close relationship with your children is of the utmost importance. “Spend time with your child everyday, asking what they did and how their day went and give them your full attention,” says Price. “Our children deserve time everyday where they feel more important than our business calls, doing the laundry or getting dinner started.”
Quality bonding time instills a greater sense of security in children and youth. A strong relationship will give kids the chance to express their feelings, concerns and beliefs. “You’ll find that your child, with your guidance and suggestions will make positive decisions on their own without feeling like you’ve lectured them,” says Price. By strengthening your bond there’ll be mutual respect and you’ll likely find your child more willing to help out.
Assess the Situation
Don’t assume every time your child refuses to cooperate that his behaviour is intentional defiance. There may other reasons why a child might be less inclined to follow rules. “Whether positive or negative, every behaviour is message. Children don’t always have the communication skills to express themselves through words, so it’s up to us parents to decipher that behavioural message,” explains Price.